Today’s First World Problem

My glasses have been slipping down my face a lot lately; has my enormous head ballooned even further, like Cristina Ricci on head steroids? Did I go to sleep and wake up as the flesh version of Mr. Mackie? When will children start to point and scream “Mommy, what’s wrong with her FACE?” At what point will I have to wear only clothes that can be buttoned on or slid up over my rear end, lest I take the risk of cutting the bloodflow off to my brain by trying to cram my head through a t-shirt hole? When do I give myself a new name, acknowledging the head spread, like ‘The Screaming Forehead Lady’ or ‘Blobula’? Do I then commission a bobblehead doll in my likeness? Will the head have to be exaggerated further lest I have the only bobblehead figure in the history of time that’s accurately proportioned?

All I know is that my glasses are starting to fracture at the temple. My favorite pair of glasses I’ve ever had, ever. The ones that are completely and utterly discontinued.

WAH WAH WAH.

14 Comments Today’s First World Problem

  1. mschilepepper April 5, 2009 at 10:28 pm

    If you know the name of the manufacturer and style number, check eBay, and do a saved search, so you get notification when new listings pop up. In the meantime, super glue is your friend! Then make sure any screws are tightened, and put a drop of super glue on those, too, to keep them tight.

    1. admin April 6, 2009 at 3:06 pm

      I think it might be time to suck it up and get contacts; this will be the second pair of these glasses that have broken and I’m starting to think they’re particularly shoddy (no matter how loved they might be).

      1. mschilepepper April 6, 2009 at 10:59 pm

        Yeah, they probably are junk, then.

        I got plenty of contacts advice, been wearing them since I was 15. I buy my disposables from 1-800-CONTACTS, and their prices and service are ace. In fact, they price match with competitors, so if you find a lower price online, they’ll refund the difference plus a few percentage points, so that’s cool.

        And they participate with MyPoints.com, so that’s another plus. If you’re not already doing MyPoints and you buy things online, let me know; I can refer you and get a bonus. It’s a great way to earn free stuff!

        1. admin April 7, 2009 at 3:35 pm

          Adding to the argument for junk is that before this style, I had NEVER broken a pair of glasses, and I’ve been wearing them since I was seven.

          I wore non-disposable contacts for a couple of years when I was in high school; I think I’ll schedule the eye exam and see with the optometrist has to say about it–in 2001, my eye doc wanted me to switch to hard contacts because the soft ones were making my eyes suffer a lack of oxygen, but I absolutely couldn’t get used to the hard ones. So if hard is the only option open to me, I’ll stick with glasses instead. Improved tech on the disposables might have changed things up, though. 🙂

          I’ve never even heard of MyPoints before.

          1. mschilepepper April 7, 2009 at 9:52 pm

            They tried to get me to switch to hard/gas permeable lenses years ago, and I couldn’t deal with them, either. Hard lenses give better correction if somebody has astigmatism, because you get tears up under the lens, filling in the area between the lens and your eyeball, whereas soft lenses conform fully to your eye’s shape.

            There have been a lot of advances in soft lens technology; the ones I wear are made for better oxygenation. I have a real problem with neovascularization, so they won’t let me wear anything else.

            Seriously, you’ve never heard of MyPoints.com? What’s your main email addy, and I’ll refer you!

          2. admin April 8, 2009 at 4:18 pm

            I’m lucky enough to have an oblique astigmatism AND neovascularization; though at my last eye exam, the astigmatism was improving. Sometimes I wish I was a candidate to have laser eye surgery, but I’m such a wussy when it comes to eye stuff that they’d probably have to straightjacket me to get me to stay on the table.

            Send me some info. mellzahbot at gmail d0t com

          3. mschilepepper April 8, 2009 at 9:40 pm

            Yeah, I wish I could do lasik, but they won’t even touch me. My Mom tried to have it done, but she had cataracts, so they wouldn’t do it. But, bonus, the cataract removal helped her vision.

          4. mschilepepper April 8, 2009 at 9:40 pm

            Yeah, I wish I could do lasik, but they won’t even touch me. My Mom tried to have it done, but she had cataracts, so they wouldn’t do it. But, bonus, the cataract removal helped her vision.

          5. admin April 8, 2009 at 4:18 pm

            I’m lucky enough to have an oblique astigmatism AND neovascularization; though at my last eye exam, the astigmatism was improving. Sometimes I wish I was a candidate to have laser eye surgery, but I’m such a wussy when it comes to eye stuff that they’d probably have to straightjacket me to get me to stay on the table.

            Send me some info. mellzahbot at gmail d0t com

          6. mschilepepper April 7, 2009 at 9:52 pm

            They tried to get me to switch to hard/gas permeable lenses years ago, and I couldn’t deal with them, either. Hard lenses give better correction if somebody has astigmatism, because you get tears up under the lens, filling in the area between the lens and your eyeball, whereas soft lenses conform fully to your eye’s shape.

            There have been a lot of advances in soft lens technology; the ones I wear are made for better oxygenation. I have a real problem with neovascularization, so they won’t let me wear anything else.

            Seriously, you’ve never heard of MyPoints.com? What’s your main email addy, and I’ll refer you!

        2. admin April 7, 2009 at 3:35 pm

          Adding to the argument for junk is that before this style, I had NEVER broken a pair of glasses, and I’ve been wearing them since I was seven.

          I wore non-disposable contacts for a couple of years when I was in high school; I think I’ll schedule the eye exam and see with the optometrist has to say about it–in 2001, my eye doc wanted me to switch to hard contacts because the soft ones were making my eyes suffer a lack of oxygen, but I absolutely couldn’t get used to the hard ones. So if hard is the only option open to me, I’ll stick with glasses instead. Improved tech on the disposables might have changed things up, though. 🙂

          I’ve never even heard of MyPoints before.

      2. mschilepepper April 6, 2009 at 10:59 pm

        Yeah, they probably are junk, then.

        I got plenty of contacts advice, been wearing them since I was 15. I buy my disposables from 1-800-CONTACTS, and their prices and service are ace. In fact, they price match with competitors, so if you find a lower price online, they’ll refund the difference plus a few percentage points, so that’s cool.

        And they participate with MyPoints.com, so that’s another plus. If you’re not already doing MyPoints and you buy things online, let me know; I can refer you and get a bonus. It’s a great way to earn free stuff!

    2. admin April 6, 2009 at 3:06 pm

      I think it might be time to suck it up and get contacts; this will be the second pair of these glasses that have broken and I’m starting to think they’re particularly shoddy (no matter how loved they might be).

  2. mschilepepper April 5, 2009 at 10:28 pm

    If you know the name of the manufacturer and style number, check eBay, and do a saved search, so you get notification when new listings pop up. In the meantime, super glue is your friend! Then make sure any screws are tightened, and put a drop of super glue on those, too, to keep them tight.

Comments are closed.