I’m Idaho!

Lack of forethought can give people trouble in a number of ways–it can result in bad marriages, giving birth to Satan’s child, car accidents–any number of untold troubles. In my case, lack of forethought resulted in me desperately scrubbing my face until my skin ached bemoaning that I would NEVER get rid of ALL of this glitter before my next engagement.

But I’m getting ahead of myself.

On Saturday, a group of becostumed folk met at Gasworks Park to have a picnic in honor of daemonwolf‘s birthday and also because we won’t be seeing her for a couple of months as she’s following her dreams, taking a work sabbatical and journeying south to take an intensive class in a subject she’s interested in. In other words, she is brave and awesome and we’ll miss her.

I had fully intended to put together some manner of costume for this get together. You know what they say about intentions and laziness or intentions and four Stoli Around-The-Worlds the night before? What, they don’t have a saying about that? Plans go awry. MY plans went awry. I overslept by hours. HOURS. And then in desperation grabbed at makeup and furiously went to town while still half-asleep.

This is how I ended up with a makeup mask that looked like Cher, The Crow, and Gene Simmons had a glitterbaby.

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When I left the apartment, I made sure to bring some bottled water, a washcloth, and some baby shampoo as I knew I would need to wash everything off before I left daemonwolf‘s party to attend mxpwr‘s birthday or face merciless mockery. I tried to plan. I did!

 

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At one point, someone suggested a round of Ninja vs Luchador Twister, which was ultimately refused, and I may never get over my disappointment.

 

 

 

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ravenmimura found a broken wolf sculpture in a thrift store and using his amazing art powers, transformed it into a zombie wolf sculpture with glowing eyes and exposed ribs and entrails. I’m sad I didn’t get a closer photograph of it–it was really impressive!

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Latex is the devil.

 

At some point, adding to the whole surreal feel of the day, the group attracted people dressed in fursuits.

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Sometime around five, I needed to leave to head to the Elephant & Castle for Chad’s birthday party. I pulled out my face-cleansing supplies and had more than a moment of horror when I realized that the base I used to stick the glitter to my face wasn’t washing off, it was just smearing around. Anyone walking or driving by my parked car at the moment would have witnessed a freakout session of nuclear proportions. As luck would have it, not one, but three ducks drove by so entire boatloads of quacking tourists saw me flailing and clawing at my face. Because the soap & water didn’t want to cut through the base, I ended up using the washcloth dry and scrubbing the makeup off that way, but every time I thought I’d gotten it all, I’d look in the light and realize I was still coated in glitter. My washcloth was so filthy by this point that it would have only served to deposit MORE glitter on my face. In desperation, I ended up popping my trunk and using shit I should’ve moved into my apartment months ago to scrape at my face some more. Finally ALMOST presentable, I then spilled water all over myself and my front seat and my steering wheel, because I can’t go anywhere without looking like perhaps I might have wet my pants.

I FINALLY made it to the Elephant & Castle, had a drink, and eventually stopped feeling self-conscious about my bright pink face. After dinner, we were all split into six teams for trivia: Team Winner Winner Chicken Dinner, Team Awesome, Team Ramrod, Team Ultimate Badasses, Team Sweet Fuckin’ Zona, and Team Six on the Beach. Clearly, the team I was on and named were the Ultimate Badasses.

Trivia was divided into a few different categories–Wild Card, Music, TV & Movies, Travel, The Simpsons, and Sports. After the first three rounds, Team Ultimate Badasses were in dead last. I don’t think I knew ONE correct answer. It was around this time that a few people needed to leave, and Team Ultimate Badasses ended up being retired with the remaining members split among the other groups to handicap them. Little did they know when I was placed on team Winner Winner Chicken Dinner that Simpsons trivia is where I’m a viking, and I redeemed myself by knowing every answer in that category. With that and the rest of the team’s combined sports knowledge, we swept the final two rounds and took first place! Team Ultimate Badasses may have bitten the dust, but the important thing is that I went home with prizes because I am the sorest loser ever.

Ever.

And I STILL have glitter on my face.

23 Comments I’m Idaho!

  1. loosechanj September 29, 2009 at 9:34 pm

    I’m trying to come up with something funny but I got nothing. 🙁

    1. uncledisgusting September 29, 2009 at 10:19 pm

      Great post. Lots of chuckles. When I have to do the pub quiz kind of thing the only team name I will coutenance is “the ladies octagenarian naked leapfrog team”.

      1. admin September 30, 2009 at 4:39 pm

        That is an amazing name and quite frankly I may end up stealing it at some point!

        1. uncledisgusting September 30, 2009 at 6:41 pm

          It’s yours darling painting pictures with words. Mwah.

  2. evillinn September 29, 2009 at 11:01 pm

    That last photo is my favorite from the day, and among my favorite ever of the little red head.

    Glitter is a nasty, pervasive bitch. I’ve been utterly stunned when I’ve discovered the remnants of glitter months after having worn it.

    I wish I had known you were battling with it – I had some face-cleaning stuff in my bin ‘o crap.

    1. admin September 30, 2009 at 4:42 pm

      I take so many pictures that I occasionally get lucky. 🙂

  3. cuntress September 29, 2009 at 11:33 pm

    Surreal? I’ll say!! Awesome!

  4. g33kgrrl September 30, 2009 at 12:24 am

    I was going to say, HOW DID YOU NOT KNOW THE SIMPSONS TRIVIA?

    Also, you look pretty in your glittermask.

    1. admin September 30, 2009 at 4:41 pm

      There was one simpsons question in the tv&movie section that I missed–it was “What was the name of the store where Homer buys his gun that’s a tribute to a national sheet & towel retailer?”

      I couldn’t remember ‘Bloodbath & Beyond’ for the life of me.

  5. nicolemarieh September 30, 2009 at 1:20 am

    i love you so fucking much !

    1. admin September 30, 2009 at 4:44 pm

      <3

  6. nonsequiturlass September 30, 2009 at 2:31 am

    Nothing other to say besides your eyes look incredible in that picture!

    1. mschilepepper September 30, 2009 at 4:44 am

      Her eyes?? Lookit those LIPS! Hubba! And an additional hubba!

      1. nonsequiturlass September 30, 2009 at 2:11 pm

        I admit being lost in her eyes (like Debbie Gibson), but I do concur.

        1. admin September 30, 2009 at 4:39 pm

          Oh good grief, you guys!

          Thank you. <3

    1. admin September 30, 2009 at 4:39 pm

      Re: I’m Idaho!

      Youdaho!

  7. poetrix618 September 29, 2009 at 10:29 pm

    “…not one but three ducks” or two bicyclists, whatever.

    “…looking like perhaps I might have wet my pants” or having wet my pants, whatever.

    Misery does love company. 🙂

    1. admin September 30, 2009 at 4:43 pm

      Hahahahaha it’s a different sort of shame but shame nonetheless!

  8. cheeserock September 29, 2009 at 10:59 pm

    the wandering furries are the best.

  9. pezking124 September 30, 2009 at 8:04 pm

    Hi. I’m Andrew and I found your Livejournal through . I am adding you as a friend. There is absolutely nothing you can do about it.

    1. admin September 30, 2009 at 8:26 pm

      Hello hello! Warning: my LJ is full of obnoxiousness, bitching, and rampant mockery. 🙂

  10. poetrix618 October 1, 2009 at 11:44 pm

    “At some point, adding to the whole surreal feel of the day, the group attracted people dressed in fursuits.”

    This simultaneously terrifies me and makes me jealous. My Saturdays are surreal, but that’s only in my head.

Comments are closed.