To counter all of this self-indulgence, I present you with some appropriate mocking names: Hellzah, Smellzah, and Fatty. Or invent your own: it’s fun!
If you’d like to send me money or extravagant gifts, I can be reached at firstname.lastname@example.org
Speaking of money and extravagant gifts, if and when I receive compensation for anything posted on this blog, I’ll always disclose my relationship with the vendor. This is in accordance with FTC regulations, but even if it was above and beyond what was necessary, I’d do it anyway, because I want to be able to trust the things I read online and I think you should be able to expect the same from me. All opinions expressed here are my own, however misguided.
Nothing published here is to be reprinted or used in any way without my express permission. Believe it or not, it’s happened before. I’m confused, too. Email first and avoid the hammer!